Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (“A scam to watch out for”)

The other day I got a phone call from a number that I did not recognize. A man was on the other line and he sounded a little belligerent. He told me that he was calling in reference to my Visa account. He said that he wanted to address my delinquent payment. A red light came on in my head and I decided to contest him on his issue (because as far as I knew all my cards were up to date payment wise). I then asked him “Which Visa are you referring to?” He then told me that by law he couldn’t mention that over the phone. I then told him to give me the last 4 numbers of the account. He said that he was not allowed to give out those numbers over the phone either because he wasn’t sure that I was the actual account holder. He insisted that I give him my account number instead. I sensed “the mother of all scams here.” I notified him that I would check all my Visa accounts and if there are any delinquencies I would call the phone number on the back of the card and address the issue with the company. I then told him that if I find no delinquencies then I was going to report this phone number to the authorities for fraud. For a little bit more he tried to debate me on giving him my card information. I told him that if he were standing right in front of me I would deck him immediately for trying to swindle me out of my money. He then “hung up.” To try to get the name of the company, I called the number right back and the phone didn’t even ring. I just kept hearing small “beeps.” Obviously this was a scam and today I just wanted to alert others. There are a lot of people out there with gimmicks designed to mislead you and trick you out of your money. If ANYONE demands your account number NEVER give it to them until you can verify who they are and who they represent. Even though this idiot didn’t get me he probably got other unsuspecting people. Be cautious, be alert and be aware. Never hesitate to question anything that doesn’t feel right. By the way, when I checked all my cards there were no delinquencies whatsoever. Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

WWW.Brettjolly.com

Email: Brettjolly@aol.com

Skype: Brettjolly1

Singer James Ingram (“One hundred ways”) with Brett Jolly. In the background are Sheldon Reynolds (formerly of Earth, Wind and Fire) and Johnnie Croom (former music director for Boyz II Men)

James Ingram

Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (“Remembering famed bassist Louis Johnson”)

Over the weekend I heard the stunning news that Louis Johnson from the great classic group the “Brothers Johnson” had passed away. During their heyday they were under the wing of Quincy Jones and had R&B toppers like “Stomp, Strawberry Letter 23, and Get the Funk out my Face.” George Johnson usually sang lead and played guitar, while his brother Louis was usually featured in  just about every song of theirs with some kind of funky bass rift or solo that other bass players (including me) loved to emulate. Louis had patterned himself after the style of Larry Graham (from Graham Central Station) and would slap and thump the bass. He was an amazing player. For those of you who are not familiar with his work, one thing that you might recognize was that he was the one who played (and created) the famous bass rift at the beginning of Michael Jackson’s all time classic “Billie Jean.” While he also played on “many other” famous projects he kind of faded from view after a while. His style of playing seemed to no longer be fashionable but yet he had already made his mark in musical history. When watching a recent interview of his online the one thing he said was that no one should ever expect to make a living off of music. He said that it is great to improve your craft, but he had to do other things because the music business was not a very profitable one. He did police work, odd jobs and even was a property manager at one point (I was also one at one point). I had heard that the brothers were not getting along and maybe that was the reason why they were no longer touring. I would have loved to have seen them in concert again (I saw them years ago at the Spectrum in Philly and they were awesome). I invite you to Google Louis Johnson and see for yourself some of the famous tracks he actually played bass on and check out his fantastic style of playing. He was one of my inspirations in music and his life will always be celebrated by me. Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought, and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

WWW.Brettjolly.com

Email: Brettjolly@aol.com

Skype: Brettjolly1

Sheldon Reynolds (formally of Earth, wind and fire) James Ingram, Brett Jolly, and Johnny Croom (formally of Boyz Ii Men)

James Ingram

Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (“Trying to live life stress free”)

This is my own personal definition of “stress: That which you allow others to put on you…” In this business of music (or probably in any other business as well) you are bound to encounter people who just “don’t want you to smile.” They try to continually put pressure on you to get more productivity out of you, and in their eyes that is the way businesses should be conducted. They are not interested in your happiness and they get off on having control over you. These people could be bosses, supervisors, family  members, friends or anyone who loves to make you just as miserable as he or she is. They often consider themselves to be experts in your field, even if in reality they don’t know squat. They thrive over having jurisdiction over your life. The deep part about this is that they can “only succeed” as far as you allow them. I am sure you know several people who are “never happy” unless they are “miserable.” While they have the right to feel the way they do they “shouldn’t” have the right to make you feel that way. What can you do to alleviate the pain and suffering that these people bring? The first thing is to “recognize” who you are dealing with. Is this person a boss or supervisor, and if so, does he or she have the necessary “qualifications” to be in that position? A LOT of employees work for people who are “dumb as a bat” and yet there isn’t much that can done about that. For these types of people it is “always best” to make “notations” about everything you are asked to do, because when things are not done right you can rest assured there will be an investigation and it is extremely advisable to make sure you have “your house” in order. Whenever your boss tells you to do something that you “know” isn’t correct, make sure to let others know. When the crap hits the fan it is always important to have “witnesses who know the truth.” Finally, if you have to, don’t be afraid to go “above the heads” of your supervisors to report wrongdoing. That way they can conduct their own investigations based on the knowledge that you have provided for them. I have personally worked for music people who will try to tell me what I should be playing. The truth of the matter is that i have perfect pitch, and I should be the one “telling THEM” what the correct notes are. For these people I often just try to give them “what they want” even if they “don’t even KNOW what they want.” No matter what, I refuse to let myself get as hyped and stressed out as they are. They worry, they fret, they make faces and weird gestures. I just do what I do, and I do it right. “No stress, Mon!” I hope you are living a stress free life and occupation as well. It is important for your health to be calm whenever possible. I love what I do, and I plan to be happy doing it. I apologize if that offends anyone. Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer. Please make the most of it today.

WWW.Brettjolly.com

Email: Brettjolly@aol.com

Skype: Brettjolly1

James Ingram and Brett Jolly (behind is Sheldon Reynolds, formerly of Earth, Wind and fire and Johnny Croom, former music director for Boyz II Men, Allyah and Genuine)

James Ingram

Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (Topic: Are women bodybuilders more attractive?)

Dear Mr. Jolly. I little while ago I decided to get buffed up. I am a woman and I would like to be a professional woman bodybuilder. I am also married and my husband has told me that he doesn’t want for me to be too well developed, but if I am going to win any bodybuilding contests I need to be in the best shape that I can be. I lift weights and do all sorts of exercises and I stay in the gym. My husband has been telling me lately that I am starting to look like a man. I would think that men would love for their women to be in the perfect shape. Bodybuilding is a great pastime for me and I love doing it. My husband took a marriage vow to love me through all obstacles, so why can’t he just accept me the way I am going to be? Wouldn’t most men crave a bodybuilder woman?

I am not too sure about this one. For me personally, I would prefer a woman who is “feminine” looking. If she is naturally stronger than me then I won’t mind it, but I surely would not want her to “look” it. I have seen pictures of some women bodybuilders and I  have to honestly say that some do not “turn me on” that way. If it makes a difference, I have known of several woman who said they would NOT want a body builder man. I even heard one woman say that she would never want a man whose chest was more developed than hers. While bodybuilding may be a fun thing for you, it sounds as though this could possibly strain your marriage. Most men that I know of are NOT into bodybuilding women. Since men are usually more “visible” creatures than women your decision could possibly have a major impact on him. Yes, he should still love you through it all, but love (at least the physical aspect of it) can wear off quickly if the “attraction” is no longer there. When you are attracted to someone, that can only come from what “appeals” to you. If it is no longer appealing, then there is no longer any attraction. Did you talk to your husband or ask him about this before you decided to take it on? We ALL change through life… No one stays the same. The person we start out with when we get married is never guaranteed to be the person you end up with. I guess the best way to put this in perspective would be to imagine if the shoe were on the other foot. If your husband decided to change his image in “any” way that you didn’t like, would you speak up or would you just accept anything he decided to do?  One day he  could show up with a mo hawk haircut (I am making the assumption that he does not have one  now) or he could do something else that you just don’t like “without” your permission. Would you be willing to just accept “any” change of image from your husband? Think carefully before you answer this one. While spouses should love each other for their minds, it is often very difficult to separate the bodies “from” the minds. The best way to handle this is to communicate with your husband, and at least be willing to try to “understand” his side. He may actually love you even more after he witnesses the final product, but you need to make him feel secure about what you are trying to do. Hear him out, and hopefully the both of you can “grow together.” Good luck to you and I wish you the best.

WWW.Brettjolly.com

email: Brettjolly@aol.com

Skype: Brettjolly1

Sheldon Reynolds (formerly of Earth, Wind and Fire), James Ingram, Brett Jolly, and Johnnie Croom (formerly of Boyz II Men)

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Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (Topic: How to break up with someone)

This relationship of ours is so over. I have had enough of this man and I am so ready to pull the plug on this tragedy. He still wants to try to work things out but I am tired of the same things happening over and over. I have told my friends that I am going to dump him, but they keep saying that I should give him another chance. What they don’t know is that I have already given him many chances and now I have reached my limit. It is time to part ways, but how should I break this to him?

James Ingram (a man I once played for) had a prophetic song out a while back entitled “There’s no easy way to break a woman’s heart.” Well, the same concept applies to men as well. Breakups are the “relationship equivalent” to an employer telling you “You’re fired.” Psychologically, the effects of it can have a “major” impact. If  your relationship was one that was filled with anger and resentment then I would strongly suggest that your “breakup” be “anything but.” Sometimes when we experience hurt from a lover we have a tendency to want to “dish” it back out when breaking up. In  fact,  your lover will probably be “expecting” anger from you, especially if that anger has already defined your relationship. As people grow, people change, and the person you started out with may not be the person that you have now. That doesn’t necessarily mean that they have turned evil, but they may have just become “different.” If you view it that way then maybe that will help you when trying to find the proper way to break up. When you verbally attack someone, it is difficult to take those words back once you “let them go.” Your lover will probably be hurt no matter “how” you break up with him, but if you do it in a way that is “not filled” with frustration or anger it might make the difference in both of your lives. Just because your relationship was filled with so much emotion doesn’t mean that your breakup has to be. If you feel you are at your total limit, then speak calmly, kindly and directly. Even if he should raise his voice, that doesn’t mean that you have to “match” him. The truth is that there really “is” no easy way to break someone’s heart. Just think of how you would want it done if someone were to do it to you, and hopefully that thought will help guide you through this task. He may (or he may not) deserve it, but even he will respect you more for “doing it this way.” Try handling it with care instead of emotion, and if you need any inspiration, try this out from the Phantom Poet:

The time has finally come and even though we must part
There’s still no easy way to break somebody’s heart
While there were some good moments of fun and stuff
The bad times outweigh the good, and I have had enough
I just want to tell him, but my friends think I am being rash
I think he needs to be discarded just like Tuesday’s trash
He knows it’s coming and he already wants another chance
He has had too may already, and that is just my stance
I am not worried about his feelings, so I already did what I had to do
I just walked up to him and shouted, “I’m done with you…I’m THROUGH”
Once I part with you, then I’m done… That has ALWAYS been my motto
Then he turned and said, “Aw, now what can I do with the money from the Lotto?”
I said, “What money? What are you talking about? I really need to know”
He said, “I played the Lotto and hit it, for about 80 million or so”
He said, “I planned to surprise you, because I wanted to share it with you”
“Now I guess I will have to find someone else since we are now through”
Maybe I was a little too harsh on him, and maybe I should cut him some slack
Now that I think of it, now just might be a “great” time to take him back
Our relationship wasn’t so bad after all, and it wasn’t so difficult for me to live through
So I told my man that I had a change of heart, and right now I absolutely “forgive you”
I said that we can even get married and I am more than happy to welcome him back to the helm
He looked at me and said “Sure, we can reunite… when icicles ornament Satan’s fiery realm”
I can’t believe he dumped me like that. How in the world could he have so much nerve?
Maybe I shouldn’t have been so mean to him, and now I guess I got what I deserve

“Yet another scintillating masterpiece” from the Phantom Poet

 

WWW.Brettjolly.com

WWW.Love-notes.co

Sheldon Reynolds (formerly of Earth, Wind and Fire) James Ingram, Brett Jolly, Johnny Croom (Former music director for Aliyah, Genuine, and Boyz II Men)

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Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (Topic: Can’t be the bigger person)

Subject = Can’t be the bigger person

I am in need of some advice in my relationship. The man I am dating has only one child, a son who is now 20 years old and he has a young lady who he considers his daughter from an ex-girlfriend who is not his biological daughter. I told him I could only accept such a situation as long as he keeps a healthy perspective and had healthy boundaries in place.  The young lady is 19 years old and she is disrespectful towards me and usually does not speak unless he makes her.  He has advised me she is jealous and requires a lot of attention. Her mother is in a relationship of her own and her spouse has called him and asked him and the mother to stop communicating with each other since the young lady is not his daughter.  I feel the man that I am seeing is holding onto an attachment that he needs to let go of.  The young woman who he treats as a daughter treats him as another source of income and is taking advantage.  She has a relationship with her natural father and does not refer to my boyfriend as Dad but calls him by his name and only calls when she needs something.  I have pointed out the manipulation and asked him to set boundaries.  I am now at the point where I am ready to end the relationship as no new woman wants to deal with this.  He is a good guy but I told him I have a big problem with this issue and I am not willing to deal with it moving forward.  Am I wrong for feeling like I don’t want to be the bigger person? Is it unreasonable for me to ask him to leave his past behind him and not expect me to accept this situation?

There are a couple of things to consider with this situation. The first thing is that the definition of family is “not” solely limited to those who are only related by “blood.” If this young woman was an integral part of his life then he still has every “right” to refer to her as his “daughter” even though she is not connected “biologically.” That being said, although she is rude and lacks manners, I don’t think it would be totally  fair for you to expect him to just “let go” of her. However, that does not mean that you should have to tolerate her behavior either. The one good thing I heard you mention is that he “makes her speak” to you. That means that he at least “knows” she is being disrespectful and is at least working to “correct” that behavior. Unfortunately this young woman is 19 years old and practically an adult. At some point she will no longer have to listen to him. Then it will be up to him to determine how he plans to handle her. Two things are absolute: He “CANNOT” allow her to disrespect you and he SHOULD NOT allow her to disrespect him. If he cannot control her negative actions towards you, then he needs to make sure she cannot visit whenever you are around. NO woman wants to see her man being taken advantage of, so you have EVERY right to feel the way that you do. Your man has “choices” and he needs to make the right ones. It should NOT, however, fall on you to make those choices “for” him. When you threaten to leave him you are basically telling him that it’s either “her” or “me.” There IS another alternative if you are willing to consider it… Just let him know that you will not come between him and his daughter, but you can’t just stand by and watch her kill his spirit either. Instead of giving him an ultimatum, try coming to him from the standpoint of love. If it breaks your heart to see him treated this way, then let him know how you feel. You can offer to step back so that he can figure out what’s most important in his life. Right now he is probably under a lot of pressure and stress. There is no need for you to add to it. Remember, when a couple forms a relationship, the only things that should “really” matter are the things that directly involve only the 2 of you. When you start to incorporate the lives of others in your relationship then it is NO LONGER about only the 2 of you. Other people should not have “any” power over your relationship. Don’t threaten to run from your man, but try to get closer to him so that he can clearly “see” what the right choice is. That way you will give “him” control to do what he feels (and knows) is best. Good luck to you, and I wish the best for this situation. Here is the Phantom Poet to disrespect the laws of good poetry:

This young girl is NOT his biologically daughter, and I sincerely hope he “forsakes her.”
She is rude and disrespectful and won’t speak to me unless he “makes her”
I asked him to “set boundaries” and if he fails he will be in hot water
I don’t feel he should take that abuse from someone who “isn’t” his daughter
He needs to know that I can’t handle this and this situation may soon worsen
But am I  being wrong for not wanting to be the “bigger person?”
She is jealous and wants attention, but in time all of this may “pass”
But until then a good remedy might be to take a belt and whip her “ass”
Let ME apply it, and I will give her at least 6 good whelps, or maybe 8 or ten
And if I whip her hard enough, I promise she’ll want to “speak to me THEN!”
She will holler, she will scream, and she will utter grunts like “Ugh” and “Ow!”
But you can rest assured that she’s getting a LOT of “attention” now…
She is getting what she “richly” deserves and no mistake am I making
I am whipping her so hard that I think the belt might be breaking
She is “TOTALLY” respectful now, and now she is not even a bother
She has been a “perfect” little angel, and she adores me and her father
I realize that she is 19, but even at that age certain changes can come true
This kind of whipping has no “age limit”… and it was “long” overdue
You see, sometimes respect is not given and that’s when it has to be earned
and that is the PERFECT opportunity to get a belt and see to it that her backside gets “burned”

“Applied lovingly, of course”… by the Phantom Poet

 

WWW.Brettjolly.com

WWW.Love-notes.co

If you have a topic that you would like to feature for my Daily Thought, please feel free to contact me via email at Brettjolly@aol.com or Brett@Love-notes.co (Or you can send me a friend request on Skype at Brettjolly1) Thank you and have a great day.

 

Sheldon Reynolds (formerly of Earth, Wind and Fire) James Ingram (“One hundred way”) and Johnnie Croom (Former music director for Boyz II Men, Allyah and Genuine)

 

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Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (Topic: Had a fling)

Dear Brett Jolly,

 

 

 

 

Subject: We had a fling

 

 

 

 

John and I have known each other for many years. We started doing volunteer work and ended up in bed after one of the projects. We are both married and felt awkward afterwards. Our spouses do not know this happened and we are going to the same surprise birthday party this weekend. I feel strange going. What should I do?. I have not seen him since our encounter.

 

 

 

 

If you want your marriage to remain intact then you don’t need to see him. You both made a mistake, but you are both human. You cannot change what happened, but you can do your best to make sure it never happens again. Unfortunately, you are going to have to live with the fact that you committed adultery. There is no getting around that. It may be in your best interest to face your demons and get this party over with as soon as possible. If his spouse is attending with him and yours is attending with you then I doubt that much will happen anyway other than a few eye stares from across the room to each other. However, if the both of you are going there alone then it might wrestle up some emotional feelings (and you don’t need that). It is going to be an uncomfortable feeling for you both, but that is what happens when you cheat on your marriage. You will probably see him there at the party, but by no means do you need to be alone with him or have an extended conversation with him. As long as you stay with your husband (and he stays with his wife) then hopefully you both should be able to stay out of trouble. By the way, the next time you want to contribute to a charity, do yourself a favor and just send them a “check” instead! Here is the Phantom Poet to corrupt your weekend:

 

 

 

 

To err is human, but to forgive is divine

 

But to have sex with someone’s spouse is not a good sign

 

He was also married, but then he knew he was doing wrong too

 

But the thought of that didn’t stop him from going to bed with you

 

You both made a mistake, and hopefully you can leave it in the past

 

And let’s just hope that at the party neither one of you gets trashed

 

What’s done… is done, and you cannot change what you both did

 

But if you want to keep your marriages happy, then keep this secret hid

 

Hopefully you both will realize when you meet up for the birthday

 

You need to say hello, shake hands, and then walk the heck away

 

I guess there is one thing that seems to be over abundantly clear

 

You really go the “extra mile” whenever you “volunteer”

 

Of course, I am sure that this incident was in essence a rarity

 

Work, money, and/or time are the ONLY things you should give to charity

 

Once the word gets out about the what your charity work entails

 

Be prepared to receive a LOT of new charity offers in the mail

 

In fact, they will BUILD new charities for you, some are now under construction

 

But I don’t think your sexual favors will earn you any tax deduction

 

So when volunteering your services, I’m sure your hard work is felt

 

Just come prepared with work clothes, a good attitude and a chastity belt

 

So when you see this guy again, keep quiet for everyone’s sake and health

 

Because what they don’t know won’t hurt you or anybody else

 

So if you plan volunteer work with a married member of the opposite sex

 

Try to avoid temptation and pay your marriages the proper respects

 

Try to resist the urge and leave that person alone

 

Because the marriage you save might just be your own

 

 

 

 

Yet ANOTHER scintillating masterpiece from the Phantom Poet

 

James Ingram and Brett Jolly, along with Sheldon Reynolds, (formerly of Earth, Wind and Fire) and Johnnie Croom (formerly MD for Boyz II Men, Genuine and Aliyah)

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