I recently talked to a friend of mine that was having an issue. She said that she goes out of her way to support her friends. She mentions them whenever she can and promotes them often. She is a singer and her friends are in a group with her. She said that recently she put out a solo musical project that a lot of people liked. However, her friends did not comment much on her project. She felt as though her friends must not have liked her project. I just told her that what she thinks is quite possible, and maybe they don’t know what to say, so they don’t say anything at all. Even if they don’t like the project, shouldn’t they at least say something? I told her that her friends are still her friends, but she needed to understand that people often have different reasons for disliking something. Sometimes it has to do with the actual product itself. Sometimes it has to do with little jealousies that people often have regarding your success. Sometimes people hate for no other reason than because ‘they can.’ If you are in any business you have to develop thick skin, and you have to realize that you can not please ‘everybody.’ If indeed her friends don’t like the project then they are entitled to feel that way. I always say there is more truth in the silence you receive from some people than the actual words they may say to you. Always listen to what is ‘not’ being said and learn from it. Never let it bring you down. When someone tells me that they don’t like something I did I take it upon myself to put out an even better project next time. I have nothing to prove to them. I do this to prove to myself. No matter what I come up with I know I cannot please everybody so I don’t expect to. I told her that when Prince opened up for the Rolling Stones he was heavily booed. That is the truth. Our success is derived mostly from overcoming our failures. Instead of pondering why some people react negatively you should compete with yourself and continue to put out better product. Then you continue to grow, and your friends might find reason to hate you even more. If you are willing to look deep inside, you may find that hate can be the ‘biggest compliment.’ Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought, and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.
Brett Jolly and Verdine White, bassist for Earth, Wind and Fire