Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (Is it better to be with someone you can barely tolerate or be alone?)

We all know that no one is perfect. The probability of finding someone who will be the “perfect fit” for you is somewhere between slim and none. Even the best of couples have disagreements from time to time. With this being said, is it better to stay with someone you know you will have issues with or simply stay by yourself? I know of people who “absolutely HAVE” to be with someone, no matter what. For most of these people it doesn’t even matter who they are with, as long as they have “somebody” there. Is that the way a relationship should be? Should you take on any person in your life just because you refuse to be alone? What do you do when you realize that this person is not right for you? Do you just ignore the things you know they will do? I believe that “people are people.” It is best to accept a person for “who and what they are” as opposed to trying to make them into “what you want them to be.” Some people are infatuated with the concept of “getting married,” while the main objective should be “getting married to the person who is best suited to be with you.” There is a difference. If you expect perfection out of anyone chances are you won’t get it. Part of the joy of a good relationship is when you can overcome obstacles together. Some couples are equipped for that, while others are not. When you can still love a person’s faults then you stand a chance of having a great relationship. Of course, not ALL faults are “lovable.” You need to choose what you can and what you can’t deal with. Love can sometimes be so complicated, but can we live without it? Most people already know if they are a challenge relationship-wise. Your task (should you choose to accept it) is to determine if this person is a good fit for you. This union may self-destruct in 5 seconds (or maybe even less). Sorry, that line was taken from the movie “Mission Impossible.” Be who you are, but most importantly, know your person for who they are. It aight make for a great and happy union…. Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought, and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

Brett Jolly and actress Gabrielle Union

Gabrielle Union and Brett Jolly

Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (Is it possible for a woman to ask a favor of a man without him expecting something in return?)

I have actually heard many stories like this. A woman needs a man to help her out with some things. It could be something like moving big furniture or car trouble. If the woman is fairly attractive, most men will jump at the opportunity to help. However, I have heard stories where if a man helps a lady out a lot then he develops some form of expectation from her. Would he be right in doing so? Should a woman depend heavily on a man to do stuff for free? I think most good guys are willing to do a good deed for a woman, at least maybe a few times. However, when it becomes a major task involving a lot of time and effort, then some men formulate a feeling of attachment. If a woman doesn’t want this type of advancement from a man, then what can she do to thwart it? One possible solution might be to “pay” the man for his services. That way he shouldn’t feel as though he is doing a lot of work for nothing. Also she could cook him dinner, even though some men might look at that as a “lead on”. I know of a situation where a guy was helping a woman with writing her songs. He did a lot of music for her but he eventually got nothing in return. When he finished he came on to her, only to get rebuffed by her, because she didn’t see him that way. Was he wrong for expecting something from her, or was she wrong for not offering something for his services? Men and women have to interact. It is the nature of humans to do so. Men and women often see things differently.  I am not making this up. No one likes to feel used.  Women have the right to be self sufficient and independent. However, that doesn’t mean that they can “continually use a man for free” whenever he is needed. The best way to avoid a feeling of attachment from a man is to make sure you don’t put yourself in a position where you need him a lot. If that can’t work, then “pay him.” Thank you so much for checking out my Daily Thought, and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

Jill Scott in concert with Brett Jolly behind her on bass guitar

Jill_Scott_and_Brett

Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (Today is the official celebration of the birthday of Martin Luther King)

History has inspired us. Of course, history has also inspired us to go in different directions as well. The people we used to honor seem a little more tainted today than they were years ago. For example, Christopher Columbus was designated as the man who discovered America. After reading up on him, it was determined that he didn’t discover America at all. There were people already here when he arrived. That is why some people celebrate his birthday as a holiday while others don’t. The same can be said for others that we honor. Some people will give different views on honoring the birthday of Martin Luther King. They have their own reasons for not acknowledging the holiday. My father, Elton Jolly, was good friends with King. I learned certain things from my father about him that a lot of other people don’t know. While King may not have been a saint, very few of us are (In other words, no one is perfect). The thing that made Martin so special was the way he united  people through the concept of peace to get objectives accomplished. King didn’t believe in going to war or hurting anyone. King changed the way people thought, and that (in my opinion) makes him worthy of a legal holiday. If not for King, people will still have separate bathrooms, separate wages, and separate conditions. The most prophetic thing about King was that he “knew” he was a marked man. He wanted to see the Promise land with us, but he knew that the reverberations of hate would gun him down. Despite all of this, King drove on. He didn’t back down and disappear like some others. I think the true measure of a man comes with how he follows up on what he believes. If he is willing to go to his death for his ideals then that makes him worthy in my book (as long as it is a moral and legal concept). Happy King Day to you all, whether you celebrate it or not. Peace is something that I think we all deserve. Please make the most of it. Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought, and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

Al Sharpton and Dick Gregory onstage with Brett Jolly on bass

Al_Sharpton_and_Dick_Gregory

Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (Song from our open mic event)

Sometimes I subject myself to torturous ridicule, but I love to do it because our Wednesday night events are so much fun. This past week a lady brought a red wig to the event, and everybody asked me to put it on.  At first I had no intention of putting it on (I have a manly reputation to uphold). However, after a few numbers I gave in to popular demand. After donning the wig I came to the conclusion that I looked like a cross between Rick James and vintage Kenny G. So at that point I decided to do a song in tribute to Rick James. Yes, it is crazy, but this reflects the kind of fun we have at the Wednesday night Grand Slam. Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought, and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (Explain the unexplainable?)

My brother told me that not long ago he talked to a man who actually “died” for about 27 minutes before he was revived. I wanted to find out more information because this intrigued me. I was told that the man who died now claims that he can talk to “people on the other side.” Do you think that is impossible? The man actually said that when he died it “felt great.” He said that nothing could harm him, he didn’t feel cold and he had no emotional effects from it. When you think about it, that sounds like it could be right. A couple questions formed for me. If he could in fact talk to people “on the other side” then how could he be oblivious to everything while he was dead? Was it because “maybe” he was not dead long enough to make any type of transition? If so, then how did he manage to come in contact with people who already died? Of course, there are a lot of unexplained phenomena that can’t really be proven. I believe in aliens, ghosts and spirits. However, it doesn’t alter my view of an afterlife. For me there is a God. Until we make that full transition from life to death there will always be a lot of things we may not understand. Can death really feel that good? I am not one who is longing to find out anytime soon. We all have a date with destiny, and no one lives forever. There have been a lot of studies done on ghosts and the afterlife. If you took time to Google some of the supernatural things that people have claimed, it just might amaze you. I have been to seminars where this can of stuff was explained, and explained well. Whether or not you believe in any of this is up to you. However, if we can exist then I believe anything else can exist as well. Think about that…. Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought, and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

The late Gerald LeVert in concert with Brett Jolly on bass

Frog3

Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (Dreams)

Last night I dreamt I was in some other city on tour. When I went into the lobby of the hotel there was a hologram of someone performing. I was tired and about to go up the elevator to my room when I recognized one of the voices in the hologram. I left the elevator and went to it, only to find it was a hologram of my father singing one of his Gospel shows. I walked up to it, saw him and cried. Right after that I woke up. For those of you who don’t know my father died on November 23, 2019. He was a gospel singer (and a very good one). I never had a dream of this capacity before when it came to him. Currently I am attempting to write and record a song that will be my final testament to him. Now I am trying to figure  if this dream has any significance to my project (or to me). Some people say that dreams hold a purpose in life. For this particular dream I won’t know anything until I (at least) see things through. Maybe it has nothing at all to do with anything, or maybe it is a message to tell me to keep going. Strange things can happen when it comes to the dead and the spirits that are left behind. This could easily be just my own imagination playing tricks with my head. I am going to take this as a positive and continue my quest to pay tribute to my father. I also want to shoot a video and post it here for people to see. Sometimes we all need to do certain things to help us move on in life. While each day helps me cope with his death a little more, I don’t think I can completely move on until I do this song. Something is driving me. Maybe it is him. I am getting there and I am working diligently on this. It is important for us all to pay attention to the things that feel significant in our lives. The messages may not always be totally direct, but it is up to you to pay attention. You might find a new purpose. Thank you so much for checking out my Daily Thought, and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

My father, Elton Jolly (1931 to 2019)

Pop 1

Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought ( Think you are qualified for employment? Watch this)

You go through the system of education. You achieve all the degrees needed to secure a high position in employment, and “yet you are homeless.” How does this happen? I invite you to check out this story on a man from Cleveland who relocated to Boston. I don’t know what his circumstances are now, but at the time of this video he was living in a homeless shelter with no job. People have said that if you go through the system and earn your qualifications then you should be hired in some capacity. Obviously this video proves differently. The real question here is “How many other qualified people are experiencing these same circumstances? I could say a lot, but this video will say a whole lot more. Please look it over, and thank you for checking out my Daily Thought. As always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.