Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (“People”)

My daughter will sometimes come to me and say something off, like “I hate people.” While I tend to laugh whenever she says that, I also realize that there can be a sliver of truth to that statement for many. There are many different personalities, customs,  and attitudes that people have, and our biggest problems are in trying to find those traits that we can live with. I know a lot of people with different diversities on life, and while I may struggle to maintain friendships with their personalities I also accept them for who and what they are. I readily admit that as “hard headed” as they are I just might be the most hard headed of them all. Don’t get me wrong, though. If you can absolutely “prove” to me that I am wrong then I will gladly own up to my mistakes. However, if you can’t prove it to me then I will continue with my own assessment of the situation. Does this make me correct? Not necessarily, but it doesn’t make me wrong either. Sometimes in order to get along with people you have to “agree to disagree.” If you expect any type of perfection out of someone you are prone to live a lie, for no one is perfect. Usually if someone brings an argument to me I can forget all about it the very next day (unless, of course, someone wants to bring that same argument up again the very day after). I don’t like to argue at all, and most times if you come at me with no attitude or prejudgment then our conversations will be very civil. However, when you start off with an attitude (and I will usually let someone know in the beginning when I sense they are coming to me with one) then you can rest assured you will get the very same thing back from me. I don’t back down. Since I had my stroke 3 months ago I also try not to deal with people’s anger issues. Negativity only brings me down when I allow it to, and I will be quick to tell someone that they have a small amount of time to get their attitude in check, or else I am ending the conversation. I love my positivity, and while it sometimes may not seem real it still helps to keep me happy. Everyone is different, and your happiness may depend on how you approach people. If you are quick to judge people without knowing the circumstances first, you may find yourself promoting negativity unnecessarily. Only you can determine if that is the type of person you want to be. The benefit of the doubt is very useful but only when you feel the urge to employ it. If you think before you act, you just might find yourself happier as a result. Above all, just know that respect is earned just as easily as respect is given. If you want to be respected, then you need to respect as well. My name is Brett Jolly, and I endorse this message 🙂 Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought, and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

Kathy Sledge (lead singer for Sister Sledge… “We are Family”) and Brett Jolly

Kathy Sledge and Brett

Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (“Song taken from last Wednesday at my open mic event”)

This song was requested so we tried to do it on the fly. I am playing my bass synthesizer instead of my bass guitar (and trying to sing lead while remembering the lyrics). It is a fun tune and I just wanted to share it with you today. Thank you so much for checking out my Daily Thought and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (“The Cycle of Life”)

I recently talked to a female friend of mine who was diagnosed with Lupus. It is a crippling disease with merciless consequences. She is suffering tremendously, and there isn’t much that anyone can do. She needs operations badly, but doctors have said that she is way too sick for them to operate on her. To hear her story is tough. To try to relate to her story is even tougher. Another friend of mine called me yesterday. He had a stroke. He was in the hospital being treated and “over-treated” for just about any possible cause. He is one really tough guy when it comes to just about everything in his life. He called me because he was getting frustrated with everything that is happening to him. He said that he planned to check himself out of the hospital regardless of what the doctors say. For him, I could feel his pain and also relate, because 3 months ago I was also in that same type of situation. The difference between us both is that after 3 days I was able to walk out of the hospital very close to one hundred percent. This is like his 6th straight day there. His situation is not life threatening but it is having a strong affect on his livelihood and money. This morning I talked to my barber and his mother died yesterday. He was feeling in a certain mood and it wasn’t great. I told him that I could relate because I lost my mother in 2004 close to the holidays as well. I am beginning to realize that there are a lot of people hurting one way or another during this time of year. Some people are going through worse experiences than others. I realize that I can’t save any of them, but I can be there for them to talk to. When we are younger we take a lot of things for granted. We can’t do that when we get older. No one lives forever… I am not posting this to make anyone despondent or depressed. I am posting this because life is not guaranteed to any of us, and we all need to start making the most of it while we still can. People die every day, and if you are able to read this then you ought to be glad that you are not one of them. Find the positive in your life. It could make the biggest difference in the quality of it, and you might just be glad that you did. Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought, and as always I wish  you the very best that life has to offer.

The Miracles with Brett Jolly on bass guitar

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Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (“Another classic song taken from last Wednesday at our event”)

Someone requested this song, and I don’t think it turned out too bad, so I decided to feature it for today. Tonight we will be performing down at Kelsey’s restaurant in Atlantic City, New Jersey (1545 Pacific Avenue) around 7:30. If you are in the area I hope you come through.  Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought ( “A fun video for those who spend a lot of money during this time of year”)

Yes, it is tough for a lot of people during this time of year. This video I am posting is one that I have done years back. I wrote, produced, directed and did all parts of this song (In other words… everything). This is not intended to make fun of anyone, but rather make an effort to find levity dealing with our situations. I hope no one is offended. It is close to the holidays, so here is my video simply entitled “Broke.” Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (“Performing another classic at our Wednesday Night events”)

Tonight we do what we really love to do… and that’s “play music.” At the Crab Tavern in Darby, PA every Wednesday night we take music to the extreme. We take requests (and actually play them), we feature artists, and we joke and have a great time. We are professional musicians who have played for some of the biggest celebrity names onstage, and we do this because we love to give back to the community. The Crab Tavern is located at 201 North MacDade Blvd in Darby, PA and we play from 8:00 to 12 midnight. We experience huge crowds each week and it lets us know that we are appreciated and supported. Live music is not dead by “any means” and we prove it each week. Thank you so much for supporting us and we are “not finished by any means.” In this segment we are doing a popular classic song. I am sure you should recognize it. I am singing the lead but we also have Chris Odom, Stan Brisbon, Mookie, Benny Barksdale, Pamela Renee, and Mickie Lynn. Hope to see you come out. Thanks again and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (“How to avoid feeling depressed during the holidays”)

The holidays should be a great time for all, but while they can bring a lot of joy to many they can also be the source of much depression. Money issues usually get exploited a lot during this time of year, and there are other causes as well (such as losing loved ones during this time, etc.). Dealing with the depression of other people can also leave you feeling stressed out. Relationships also get tested greatly during this time of year, and many couples will either go on or break up depending on if their expectations are fulfilled during this season. You can worry about all this if you like, or you can make this a happy time by “generating happiness from within.” I think it is a great move to simply “ask” people what they would like beforehand (or what they would expect from you). That way you have a better chance of matching the caliber of the gift you may receive in exchange (and avoid any uneasy moments of awkwardness). If you don’t have the money for what your special person wants then let them know and ask if they have a consolation gift that can work for now. You may end up poorer from this but at least you should be able to keep your relationship solid in the process. As for money issues, you can go broke trying to buy gifts that  you can’t afford. Make sure to “pay ALL your bills for this month first” so that you can make things work with the money you have left over. If you don’t have the money to get an expensive gift then get the next best gift you can. It makes no sense to risk losing everything during the holidays. When it comes to losing a close relative during this time of year this can be truly difficult. Nothing could ever replace this loss (and you should not be looking to replace it at all). This doesn’t mean that you still can’t enjoy the blessings you have though. No one lives forever, and if you live long enough bad things can (and will happen). If you stay busy and focused, your depression won’t have the chance to settle in. Channel your energy in a way that keeps you occupied and busy, so that way you won’t have so much time to sit alone and stare at the same 4 walls (and think unneeded thoughts). Above all, you can make this a good time with great planning and thought behind what you are attempting to do. Go to stores just to look. You might be surprised at what you find (and you might be surprised at how affordable it is). You can generate happiness simply based on what you can do for others. Happiness can be found from within, but only if you search for it. You don’t have to be a victim to the holidays. Put a smile on your face and “think before you buy” so that it can help you make the best of this time of year. Oh, and by the way, “Happy Holidays to you from Brett Jolly.” Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought, and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

Brett Jolly with Verdine White, bass player for Earth, Wind and Fire

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Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (“My thoughts on how we could possibly end racist violence”)

I just recently saw the program 60 minutes, and on it they featured a man who once was a National Extremist, a racist under the worst possible situation. The key here is that he “once was” one. Now he has reformed himself totally and understands how wrong his thinking was. He said that originally he was “taught” to believe that minorities wanted to hurt, target and even kill him, so he wanted to hurt them back. His motivation of hatred came when he actually learned that from others who misguided him. Since he had never been around people of other customs and races he never had any first hand experience with them, so he had to rely on what others taught. However, if you can be taught to hate, you can also be taught to love. While it is quite easy to formulate a hatred towards something that you don’t understand the opposite can also happen. If you are developing a hatred towards a group of people based on visual and custom differences, then obviously your hatred is based on what you “think” you know. However, what you think you know and “the truth” could be “2 very distinct possibilities.” The best way to understand people of different races is to hang with them and learn for yourself. Once you see the similarities (and the differences) you should be able to conclude that everyone is so different, which essentially makes everyone the same. Sound confusing? Not really. If you have noticed, DNA has shown that there are a LOT of variations in most people. You can’t tell just from looking at them what nationality they are. Many people who claim to be of one race may actually be of many and not even realize it. I am about to check my DNA this week. It should be interesting to see how my ancestry is traced. At some point (maybe even now) everyone will be so different that “hardly anyone will be classified as just one race.” Extremists base their feelings on what others have taught them.If you want to eliminate that kind of hatred then through the same principle of learning it can be done. Hate is something that I believe can be eliminated out of our existence, but in order to do so we need to have more education. We need to know what others think and why. We need to understand that what someone else believes may in some way mirror our own thoughts but in a different way. If necessary, I would even lock people of different races up in a room together  and would not let them out until they ”work together” with a plan. Experience can make a difference. We need to know each other. If this man who spent many years as a hate monger can change his ways then so can others. Love conquers all, but only if we can experience and feel love. I sincerely hope that one day that can actually happen. Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

Freddie Jackson in concert with Brett Jolly on bass guitar
Freddie Jackson

Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (“The difficulty of losing a loved family member so close to the holidays”)

On December 4, 2004 I lost my mother to ovarian cancer. While death has always been a part of life, no matter how much you prepare for it the timing just never seems right. I knew for a year and a half that my mother didn’t have long to live. Yesterday was the anniversary of her death. When it happened, it was so close to the holidays. Time alters all. If you live long enough you will see many changes happen during your lifetime. When my mother passed we tried to keep a positive outlook for the holidays that came up immediately afterwards, but it felt as though the spirit wasn’t genuine. I don’t know if there is a sure fire formula for keeping the holiday spirit happy once you lose a loved one, but I do know that as long as you live you still need to celebrate life. Moping over the loss of my mother won’t bring her back, and continuing to think about it won’t make me any happier. Time helps when it comes to healing, but it never “cures.” Everyone’s circumstance is different. There is always someone out there who needs encouragement and a friendly shoulder to lean on. I can’t tell people what to do with their lives. However, I do have some control over mine. Just 3 months ago I had a stroke, and I was fortunate to walk out of the hospital after only 3 days “close to one hundred percent.” After talking to other stroke victims I realized that I am blessed to be where I am. I can play, talk intelligently, and focus on things fairly close to the level I did before. Some people have said that it was a miracle I turned out the way I did. I know that is was God’s doing. Yes, I have lost some things during my years, but I have gained some things as well. The holidays are vastly approaching, and my blessings will not be ignored by me. I do realize that there are others out there who have suffered significant losses close to the holidays as well. Dwelling in the past won’t change anything, and won’t make you any happier. Pick up the pieces of what you have left in life and move on (if for no one else’s sake other than your own). If you can’t improve then you can’t grow. Your happiness comes from within. You can make it work, but only if you first allow yourself to realize you can. I wish the best for all of us…  and I’d like to see people happy… Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought, and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

Comedian Chris Tucker, brother Bill Jolly, and Brett Jolly

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