Throughout my years I have heard a lot of different stories from different people who were unhappy in relationships. In some instances I could include some of my own past experiences in that number. Most relationships start out happy with the intent of making it last. However, many of us fall in love with the wrong things in the beginning. For instance, many men will fall in love with women who have cute figures, long hair styles, great sex, etc. Many women will fall in love with men with tight abs, a great income, a fabulous profession, great sex, etc. The problem is that “none of these things are guaranteed to last.” As we grow through life we change, and the person you start out with is not necessarily guaranteed to be the same person you end up with. When we first meet people, it is the “outside surface that often attracts us.” Sometimes we get so infatuated with what’s on the outside that we tend to neglect what’s on the inside. For instance, when a man has a lot of money it doesn’t necessarily mean that he is a good man. Just because a woman can “rock your world in bed” doesn’t mean that she is someone you can spend the rest of your life with. If you want a relationship that will last a lifetime then you need to “imagine” what it will be like spending a lifetime with this person. Those small little things that you don’t like about him or her in the beginning will probably not get any better with time. In fact, they might appear to be an even bigger irritant the further into the relationship you go. People also make the mistake of forgetting that “no one is perfect.” Everyone has something about them that you probably can’t stand. The problem with most couples is that each partner seems to think he or she can “change” the person they are with. I always say that it is better to see people for who and what they are rather than try to make them into what you want them to be. Also, a terrible thing to do is say that “I can learn to love him or her later.” If you don’t feel it now, then “learning it” won’t help at all. Love is an emotion, not a mathematical statistic… Finally, many of us ignore “warning signs.” If someone seems a little controlling at the beginning, then what makes you think that they won’t be even more controlling later on? If most people could just close their eyes and imagine their lovers without those cute intangibles it might help for a longer lasting relationship. When you grow to be 90 years old that cute girly figure most likely will be gone. That manhood of yours will not be like it used to be. All you will be left with is your “great personality.” When you can fall in love with a great personality then you have a great chance of having an “awesome relationship.”We all make mistakes in life, and some mistakes can cost you more than others. Whenever you buy a new car you need to first “imagine what it will be like driving that car off the lot” before you buy it. The same mentality should apply when it comes to starting a new relationship. If you can’t “think ahead” then the future could become your worst enemy. Try loving with your eyes closed and your mind focused. The relationship you save just might be your own… Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought, and as always I wish you the very best that life has to offer.
Singer Freddie Jackson and Brett Jolly in concert