Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (“Dealing with Mother’s Day when your mother is deceased”)

For here in the states, yesterday was “Mother’s Day,” which is a day each year we set aside to honor the mothers who we believe are worthy of honoring. ¬†Even though most mothers should be honored “each day all year round,” this day just gives one special significance. While it is very admirable to honor your mother, what about those people like me who no longer have a mother that’s still living? Since my mother passed in 2004 from ovarian cancer, certain holidays have not been the same. She passed on December 14, which was close to the Christmas holidays, so naturally each year around this time we are reminded of her absence. While it gets easier with each passing year to deal with, it never feels routine anymore. There will always be something in the back of my mind to remind me of her. Yesterday I had to play a gig that was virtually “right across the street from the graveyard where my mother was buried.” Whenever I am the lead singer I usually take requests. I “knew” that since yesterday was Mother’s Day that I would have to sing this song entitled “I’ll always love my Momma” which was performed by the Intruders and written by McFadden and Whitehead” (I have performed onstage with both). This was the very first time I had been asked to sing this song, and with my mother’s final resting place across the street I tried to tackle it and do it right. I also tried to have fun with it, and not make it seem as though I was saddened over it. I told the people that I wanted to do “another Mother’s day song” that I felt was a great tune to honor mothers, so I decided to do a James Brown tune entitled “Momma come here quick, and bring me that licking stick.” It was a fun tune to do and the audience loved it, and it helped me to bring a smile to my face as well. For those of you who are without your mother like me, I completely sympathize with your loss. While Mother’s Day may have a whole new significance to you I hope you keep in mind that if your mother truly loved you, then she would want for you to move on and live your life without her. Nothing can hurt her now, and the last thing she would want is for you to be unhappy worrying about her. Let the great memories of your mother carry you through the day, and celebrate her life as though you enjoyed her being here. That’s the good thing about memories… No matter how much you look back at them, they will continue to make you smile… I sincerely hope that if you celebrated Mother’s Day, then you honored your mother as well as “other mothers” out here who are equally as deserving. Without the mothers of the world, we would cease to exist. We need to let them know that we love them and we appreciate them “putting up with our crap.” Thank you for checking out my Daily Thought today, and as always, I wish you the very best that life has to offer.


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The Intruders and Brett Jolly singing “I’ll Always Love my Momma”