Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (Topic: Should we expect blind obedience from our kids?)

Is it always in the best interest to expect a child to just “blindly obey” his parents no matter what? Should a child even be “allowed” to question his parents if that child wants to know something? Many people think it is disrespectful for a child to do anything less than what that child has been “directed” to do. I am always for a child respecting his parents, but if a child has a disagreement or if the child is confused,  then how does that child learn anything if he or she is just “expected” to keep quiet? Children are “naturally” inquisitive  and they can learn a lot through the teachings from others as well as from their own personal experiences in life. While many children are expected to respect their elders I know of too many elders who “think” like children. I would not want any child of mine to blindly obey what some of these people would tell them. When I was younger I had a “LOT” of questions for my parents. My mother often thought that I asked too many questions and often didn’t want to be bothered. As long as she said it then that should have been “good enough.” My father always took the time to answer my questions for me, and I honestly believe I learned a lot from that. If you told your child to do something that was wrong (but you didn’t realize it) would you accept your child “correcting” you (or asking you to explain the situation?). As long as the child is not being disrespectful then I think a child has a “right” to know. The other day I heard a mother giving her little boy a directive and when the boy questioned her about it, her answer was “Because I said so.” I was just thinking about what would happen if a mother told a child to stay in a room and not come out and then there just happened to be a small fire. Should the child stay there and perish just because his mother “said so?” We need to give our children “room to grow” even if it means we sometimes come under scrutiny. If my children corrected me (respectfully) I would have no problem with that, because then I feel my kids are maturing and learning. NO parent is perfect, and a child needs to be able to have the same opportunities to make mistakes just like we had growing up. It shouldn’t hurt to actually “listen” to your child. We can even become better as parents if we take that little extra time to “listen” to what our kids have to say. When I was in second grade I was a fairly good artist. I drew everything that I felt I could. Well, one day, my teacher found a drawing I had made of a naked man and a naked woman. She was angry and sent me down to the main office where I was promptly suspended from school. My  father had to come up to the school to talk to the principal. In the office my father told me that I was  wrong, and then he asked me where I got the idea from to draw those pictures. Well, the day before a professional artist had visited our classroom and showed us some amazing pictures that he  drew. I had the chance to talk to him (since I was really interested in art) and I asked him to show me his samples. Wouldn’t you know it, this artist had done sample “nudes” in his portfolio and he showed them to me. Wanting to be like him, I decided to draw my own and that was what I got suspended for. My father brought that fact to the attention of the principal and then alerted to them that his son only did what he learned from their artist that “they” brought into the school. Needless to say I was reinstated… and I was thankful to have a father that took the time to understand my situation. If my father had not taken the time to find out the truth, then I would have been unfairly labeled for  mimicking a professional that was actually hired by the school to inspire me to draw. I promised myself back then that I whenever I have kids in the futureI will “make sure” that I listen to what they have to say. Every child should listen to his parent, and every parent should listen to his child. Thank you for reading my Daily Thought and I wish you the very best that life has to offer.

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Email: Brettjolly@aol.com

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The late Gerald Levert and Brett Jolly in concert

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