A friend of mine told me about this woman that he started dating. He liked her a lot but there is a problem that he wasn’t sure he could handle. He said that the woman is ‘religious’ with a “strong” faith. He doesn’t fault her for that at all, but while he is also a believer in God, he is nowhere near her level when it comes to his own lifestyle. Whenever they spend time together he said it seems as though they have 2 different agendas. He would love to talk about different things in life and date like he feels a couple should. He said that this women can only focus on Jesus and scripture. Several times when he wanted to just hold her in his arms she would break free and ask him to hold her hands so they could pray together. Whenever he wants to invite her out to a movie she asks if they can go to church instead. My friend said that he can understand all of that, but he also wonders if he is wasting his time with her. He said that “A man has needs” and while he realizes that faith should be one of those needs he doesn’t want to make that the ONLY need of his that “gets satisfied.” I told him that when it comes to relationships, you don’t “just date” the person. You also date “ALL that he or she believes in and his or her responsibilities.” In some instances trying to separate a woman and her love of God can be paramount to attempting to separate her from her children. Chances are it is not going to happen. I told him that if he is going to love her he will have to love her religion as well. If he has any plans of corrupting her values then he needs to move on. He responded by saying that she “knows” he is not as religious as her but yet she loves to spend time with him as well. He then asked me if I think she should just go find a man of the church. I told him that finding a man (or woman) of God is no guarantee of anything, because some of the biggest devils can actually be “found” in the church. Ministers and preachers are “every bit as human” as the rest of us and equally subject to temptation. If a man wants to love a “devoted” church woman, then he has to be prepared to accept her “religious” ways. She has needs as well, and if her faith is her strongest need then as a man you can’t ignore that. Most men love a little intimacy. I told him to tell her how he feels and to listen to what she has to say about it. If she is one of those women who believes in no intimacy before marriage then as a man you need to accept her for what she is rather than try to make her into what you want her to be. Respect her wishes and respect her lifestyle as you would have her do yours. I told him that if he really wants to find out how he should handle her then he needs to “read up” on it. He then asked me what book would have that information. I told him to get “the Bible.” The answers will be “in there.” Thank you for checkout out my Daily Thought today, and please have a great weekend.
Aretha Franklin and Brett Jolly