Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (Topic: Should your lover vacation without you?)

I have a problem that I would like to bring to your attention. My man and I have a very good relationship. We do a lot together, and it feels like the love is still there. We have been together for 3 years and so far everything seems fine. However, recently he told me that he wanted to take a vacation with ONLY his male friends. They would like to go out of the country to Brazil. I am shocked that he would prefer to be with his boys rather than me. He told me that it was harmless and that it would only be for a week. I cannot understand why he would not want to go with me instead. Am I being too insecure about this? Should a committed man be allowed to take a vacation without his lover?

For the record, I have been to Brazil “several” times, and there is “NOTHING” harmless about THIS place. When I was there, the number of women “far” outweighed the number of men. MANY of the women down there are “starved” for male companionship, and there is a “strong”  attraction for American men. There are also lots of scantily clad women and prostitution is rampant there. I performed there with Billy Paul (“Me and Mrs. Jones”) years ago at a big venue filled with “mostly” women. At one instance, there was a couple who were walking around arm in arm. When they passed me the woman looked back at me and gave me a big “wink.” While I was onstage women were throwing me “white roses” and napkins with their phone numbers on them. I remember one woman wanted my autograph, but she didn’t have ANY paper (just let your imagination roam on this thought, okay?). Just about ALL the women on the beaches of Rio wear “thongs.” Certain parts of Brazil are “very” beautiful and scenic. However, when a bunch of guys go to visit, I highly doubt it is the “environmental” atmosphere that “attracts them.” For the record, I don’t see much wrong with a lover taking a small vacation with his OR her friends of the same sex. It is okay to “periodically” take a small break from your lover. I have known of married women who ventured off harmlessly with other friends to places for a quick getaway. Guys can do it too, but a LOT depends on the nature of the friends he is has going with him. If you know his friends, then you need to know if most of them are “single” or at least “act” like they are. A “married” or “committed” man should NOT go vacationing with “single” male friends, because they may be “too much of an influence” on him (ESPECIALLY in a place like Brazil). If a man  is going to take vacations, then there is NO WAY  he should be taking more vacations “without” you than “with” you. It is quite possible that his planned trip could be harmless, but I just can’t see it. If you both live together, I would strongly suggest you talk it over. It is important that you feel secure about it before he commits to taking this trip. There are reports of LOTS of social diseases as well there. There is a reason why mostly men like to travel to Brazil, and I just explained most of the reasons already. I can’t tell you that he should not go (because that depends on the relationship that you both have) but the best thing you can tell him is that whatever he does down there “can” have a bearing on your relationship when he returns. Give him something to think about while he is down there. Let me give you a small example: If you have a child inside a yard with a gate, and tell that child to stay in the yard while locking the gate, chances are at some point that child is going to ponder “climbing” over the gate to see what life is like on the outside. However, if you leave that gate “open” and tell that child the consequences of what may happen should he venture outside the gate, then that child will at least THINK heavily about the repercussions before daring to go out. Your man works the same way. If he does decide to go to Brazil, tell him that he can do whatever he wants down there, but once he does something wrong, he WILL NOT be able to return to you. Then ask him if it is “worth” the risk. Good luck to you, and I hope that the both of you can come to some form of understanding. Here is the Phantom Poet to help make you feel better:

My man wants to vacation and he says he has time to kill
So he and his boys are plotting to go away to Brazil
He tells me this is “harmless” and says, “Nothing’s wrong, see?”
But how dare he even think of taking a vacation without me?
He said he wants an outing with some of his male friends
And should I be skeptical? Well, that all depends
Once he is there I won’t be able to see how he lives
But what he doesn’t know is that I will be in the hotel next to his
And I shouldn’t have too much of a problem wondering where he is at
Because I will be following him disguised with shades and a big hat
And if he and his male friends are up to any funny tricks
I will record it all while following them and taking pics
So I can make sure that I have all my evidence in store
And my plane will be scheduled to leave home the day before
Once I confront him with the evidence and he tries to deny that
I will proceed to whip him down with a recently purchased Brazilian baseball bat
And while I am beating him, he will probably shout, “Where did you get that from?”
I’ll say, “From the store next to your hotel…Now don’t YOU feel dumb?”
This Brazilian bat was cheap, and I am whipping you to my own satisfaction
Because you are lying to me, and I already SAW you in action
You wanted to go to Brazil and cheat, and I hope your trip was gainful
Because this bat I bought for you, because sometimes love… is “painful”…

“This trip sure made an impact on him”… The Phantom Poet

Send me a friend request on Skype at Brettjolly1. Thank you and have a great day.


The Emotions (“You got the best of my love”) and Brett Jolly