Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (Topic: “Insecure girlfriend”)

Can you please help me? I have a woman who is constantly checking up on me. She comes to my job all the time just to see if I am there. She goes through my phone to see if other women are calling. She went through my pants pockets to see if I have women’s phone numbers. She calls me every hour and gets upset if I can’t answer at that time. I love this woman dearly, but I don’t love her suspicions. I am a good man, but she is always investigating and  interrogating me. From a man’s perspective, how do you think I should handle this?

She is probably overly suspicious because of some past relationship she had where her ex cheated on her. Unfortunately, a lot of people in new relationships have to pay for the wrongdoings of the “previous” administration. You need to let her know that until you give her something to be “concerned about” she needs to ease up and “have faith” in you.  Let her know that trust is a “VERY” important factor in relationships. If she wants you to trust her then she needs to start trusting you. The question here is: Did you DO something that made her mistrust you? If you did, then just accept the fact that she will continue to have issues of insecurity when it comes to you (at least until you prove otherwise). However, if you have done nothing wrong then she needs to stop judging you by the standards of her own past. I have never seen any instance where mistrust makes a relationship “better.” Sometimes it can take a while for the baggage from previous relationships to wear off. If someone has been hurt in a prior relationship then that pain can often be carried into the new relationship. If you are an understanding man then hopefully you can have patience through this, but in the meantime you need to help her see that you are not the person who abused her love.  Communication should always be the first step. Reason with her but make sure you are understanding to her as well. It could make a “world” of difference. Good luck and let’s welcome the Phantom Poet for today’s follow up:

Whenever I tell my girl that I want to spend time out with the fellas
She gets a big attitude with me and becomes crazy “jealous”
When I’m home I don’t have very much  time to even take a shower
That’s because my baby calls me every hour… “ON” the hour
If there is ANYTHING different about me it never gets past her detection
Every time we get together I have to line up against the wall for “inspection”
She even inspects my clothes after I come back from a morning in church
In order for her to do it thoroughly, I have to go through a “strip search”
She goes through my pockets, my wallet and I suffer such depravity
This woman even puts on rubber gloves to check my “anal cavity”
It’s embarrassing enough that I have to stand in front of you totally bare
But do you REALLY expect to find something of significance “back there?”
I know that I am a good man and there is no way that I am going to cheat
But this woman will go off if she finds a stray hair at my feet
I knew she had security issues but she is even worse that previously predicted
This woman went so far as to even have my cable TV “restricted”
This has gone way too far and I’m beginning to think she needs help
There is NO WAY in the world you’ll get me to wear a “chastity belt”
If we don’t correct this then there is no way to tell how long this will go
She even grabs me in my private parts to see if my “levels are low”
How can I deal with this woman and just what needs to be done?
From a man’s perspective, there can only be one answer… “RUN!”

“Run, Forrest….Run as fast as you can”… The Phantom Poet

If you have a topic that you would like to feature for my Daily Thought, please feel free to contact me via email at or (Or you can send me a friend request on Skype at Brettjolly1) Thank you and have a great day.

Singer Jill Scott and Brett Jolly in concert


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