Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (Topic: boyfriend won’t do oral sex)

I have a question for you.  My new “boyfriend” recently informed me that he does not and never has performed oral sex.  Trust me, he is a selfishly happy receiver but not a giver.  His reasoning is what has taken me over the edge. He thinks he may become sick from the taste since many “foods” in his past have made him ill.  He even added insult to injury by informing me the smell may affect him as well. Now he is a pretty straightforward kind of man so I almost believe that he truly thinks this, plus he is just weird enough to really think that he will become sick because he has never had it before and is afraid to try new “foods”.  I am really on the fence with this whole, “It will probably make me sick” nonsense, but do you know of any medical basis for this?  Could this be for real or is he just a SELFISH BASTARD?
I just “love” the way you capitalized “Selfish Bastard”. When you think about it, everyone is different and people have different means when it comes to loving someone. For example, some people love to have their necks nibbled on while others might find it very ticklish there. It sounds as though you have a man who is somewhat set in his ways, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t have a great relationship with him. Most people have at least SOME sexual limitations (but not EVERYONE… Some people can get REALLY “buck wild”). If this particular aspect of lovemaking is foreign to him, then the only way to help him conquer it is to talk to him and try to introduce it “slowly”. When you try to “force” something new on someone it can sometimes have adverse effects. Only you can determine just how much oral foreplay is valued in your relationship. If it is so important to you that it might actually jeopardize your relationship with him then only you can determine if you want to continue on. However, part of being in a relationship is being able to work out any problems you have (including sexually) and even try to find compromise in certain areas. If you leave him and find another man who is great orally the new guy may have “other” deficiencies that could be even worse. Medically, I do not know of ANY rationale for making a man sick to oral foreplay, but I do know about how eating habits can affect some people. I have known people who became vegetarians and OMITTED all meat from their diet. When they found out the vegetarian thing didn’t work, they then decided to go back to eating meat (like fried chicken). Because they had not eaten meat for so long they became sick when it was re-introduced to their systems. Your body may try to repulse foreign objects it is not used to. Just like you have food appetites people also have different sex appetites. If you cannot get your man to visit the land “down under” then maybe you both can come up with a viable substitute compromise that can make the both of you happy. After all, if you love someone, compromise might be the way to make your relationship even better. Of course, the Phantom Poet has a whole different take on this:
My boyfriend only deals with certain foods, I have found
And I think that is the reason why he won’t “go down”
I have tried to coerce him with sweet, gentle sexual persuasion
But I just can’t seem to get him to perform an “oral dissertation”
His explanations sound like BS and I think he is pouring it on thick
How in the world can any man claim that oral sex makes him sick?
I cannot wait for the day when oral sex he has mastered
But until that day comes, he’s just a “SELFISH BASTARD”
Now he may not be a bad man, and he is straight forward as he can be
But I want him to go below “sea level” to satisfy me
I don’t want to seem selfish too, but I really don’t think I’m wrong
I just want him to place his face where he thinks it don’t belong
I understand that changing him may be highly doubtful
But I want him to be prepared to take in a mouthful
An “oral” less relationship is surely no way to live
Does he think it’s better for him to “receive” than to “give?”
He might actually “like it” if he would just try his luck
I think I might have the only relationship that actually “DOESN’T” suck
Other than that, our relationship has blossomed just fine
But in a different way, I would like for his “lips” to touch mine
I will even cheer him on with a special cheer I can yell
“Gimme an O, gimme a R, gimme an A, gimme a L”
I am an understanding woman, and I really am not a debater
But I like to get oral kinky (The whips and chains can come later)
So ladies, if you have a man who will not go “down” with you
Just sit on his face, until his cheeks turn blue
At some point, he will have to gasp for air
And what better point to do it when his mouth is right there?
I have now converted my boyfriend, and he knew he had to learn
But now he has this look of anticipation as he says, “Now…it’s YOUR turn…”
“Mmmmmph” … The Phantom Poet

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Gerald Alston (Lead singer for the Manhattans) and Brett Jolly