Subject: He gave her an STD
What’s the proper etiquette for telling someone that they gave you an STD? I’ve been dating this guy for six weeks and recently developed a burning sensation. I went to my doctor, who says it’s chlamydia. Obviously I cannot sleep with this guy again. He told me he wasn’t dating anyone else. Now that I know he was lying, I’m inclined to break up with him. Should I tell him about the STD or just break it off?
By ALL means “break it off”! Oh, by the way, I wasn’t referring to your relationship… I am referring to his “penis”… Okay, for the record I really do NOT advocate violence on my Daily Thought (so please don’t take what I said seriously). Here is the issue you have to deal with. He lied to you, and even though he was wrong YOU should have taken your OWN precautions for dealing with him (especially if you have known him for only six weeks). All it takes is ONE wrong encounter to alter your life dramatically. This time you got a second chance, but next time you might not be as lucky. As for whether you should tell him or not, the answer to that is “ABSOLUTELY Yes”. He needs to at least know about it so that he can attempt to get cured (and hopefully avoid infecting the next unsuspecting woman he meets). Yes, it would be a very wise choice to break up with him. As far as I know, there is NO proper “etiquette” for telling someone they gave you an STD (I can’t help but to imagine someone saying, “Pardon, sir, but your worldly member is widely tainted and thoroughly contaminated to the point of infestation, thus infecting me with a social impropriety. I will now commence with your ultimate, eminent and vigorous beat down.”) The truth of the matter is that you should say, “You (bleep), you gave me a (bleep) STD, and now I’m going to SHOOT your (bleep). Now THAT sounds like the “proper” etiquette to me… Just be truthful and try to resist the urge to cut him during your conversation. Here is the Phantom Poet to help promote STD peace:
I didn’t think this could happen; it was something I just couldn’t see
This man I have known for the past 6 weeks just gave me an STD
He told me he wasn’t dating anyone else so how could I have been so naïve?
It makes me wonder what other little tidbits he has up his sleeve
Should I tell him about the problem or just tell him it’s through?
Should I beat him with a bat, or choke and shoot the bastard too?
He messed around with some scab, and he contacted Chlamydia
He told his doctor that he got it from some tramp named Lydia
The doctor screamed and said, “Now you’ve also messed up my life”
“Because that tramp named Lydia just happens to be my wife”
“Now not only do I have to treat you, but I also have to treat myself”
“Let me see if I can find some good medicines up here on my shelf
Instead of depending on medicine, maybe we should try a new tactic
When you or anyone tries to get with my wife, we should both wear a prophylactic
So if you want to always keep yourself in the very BEST of condition
Then remember that an ounce of prevention is worth a “round of ammunition”
A woman needs to take precautions and not be careless, you see
So that hopefully in a relationship she can avoid getting an STD
So when it comes to sexual activity, it is best to be sure
Before you bring home something that NO medicine can cure…
“How about pixie dust?”… The Phantom Poet
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Vintage picture with Brett Jolly and Holly Robinson-Peete