Subject: Neat freak… NOT!
After 10 years of being married I have been reminded I am a terrible housekeeper. My husband bribes, begs and fought with me over picking up around the house. We do not live in squalor but with kids and meals and sports, etc. there just isn’t time. Why is it so important that things be lined up from a to z instead of us just being happy?
“Because your husband is happiest when the house is clean, dammit!” If your husband has been reminding you for 10 years that you are a terrible housekeeper, it is probably because to “him” you cleaned the house terribly for 10 years. You say that with kids, meals and sports there isn’t time to clean the house, but don’t most other households have circumstances similar to yours? Normally, if you have kids, they will often eat meals, and some of them may even play sports. Are you saying that because of these things you don’t have time to clean house? Everyone in the household should have some responsibilities when it comes to the upkeep of your home, so the cleaning of it should not fall “solely” on you. However, if everyone else has other responsibilities and you don’t have much when compared to them (or if you are home during the day when just about everyone else is out) then it might be considered the proper thing to pick up around the house every once in a while (okay, maybe every “twice” in a while). I am not one to stereotype, but in most houses women are usually the neat ones who are often fighting with the men to be a little more orderly and tidy. I find this little bit of role reversal “intriguing.” After 10 years of “sloppy” marriage it will probably be tough for you to change your ways, but if you can make an effort and try it for your family it may make the biggest difference in the world to them. I am sorry, but the excuse about kids and sports and stuff doesn’t cut it. If you have time to shower, then you have time to pick up things around the house (Uh, you DO have time to shower, right?). There is an old saying that goes like this: “Cleanliness is next to Godliness”. For God’s sake, woman, start cleaning up! Here is a helpful hint from the Phantom Poet to help you on your way:
My husband wants me to pick up around the home
He even asked the Phantom Poet to talk about it in this poem
He then handed me an old mop of his
I couldn’t figure it out and asked, “What in the world is this?”
He said, “Never mind. Why don’t you try out this broom instead?”
I said, “Did this thing come with instructions for I surely have never read”
He said, “ I can’t believe you have never even heard of a broom.
Why don’t you try your luck at using this here vacuum?
Just run it over the floor. In that corner is where you can begin
I did exactly what he said, but I “forgot” to “plug it in”
But I did use it like he asked. It was surely his choice
I just couldn’t figure out why it wasn’t making much noise
He said, “Do you think you could at least find time to wash ONE dish?”
I looked at those things in the sink and said, “Huh… you wish.”
He ALWAYS asks me to do that… It never, ever fails
But I really don’t want to take a chance on ruining my nails
So one day I tried to wash dishes, but I felt like such a dope
He said, “It’s no good unless you decide to use some soap”
He doesn’t think I can cook either, but I know my cooking is the rave
One morning I fixed him three hard-boiled eggs I put in the microwave
I guess I shouldn’t have done it that way, but I figured I would take the gamble
After the explosion, my husband had his hard boiled eggs… “Scrambled”
Well, I guess I must not be the best housewife in town
But given enough opportunities, my skills will come around
ONE day I will be great at it, and that day will mark my deliverance
Let’s just hope that in the meantime, our house can survive the experience
“The roof… the roof… the roof is on fire”… The Phantom Poet
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New generation vocalist Dwele and Brett Jolly performing in concert by the river