Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (Topic: Child Support)

Dear Brett,

Recently the actress Halle Berry  was ordered to pay child support of $20,000 a month to her ex-husband Gabriel Aubry. She is the mother of her child so do you think it is right for a mother to pay child support?

 

I am NOT a big fan of child support for most people and I will tell you why. The court system is set up so that the parent who has to pay for the child has to give the money to the “other” parent. That would work out great if the other parent utilized that money correctly and “directly” towards the welfare of the child. Too many times the money goes to buying other things that have absolutely “nothing” to do with the child. For instance, many mothers take their “baby daddy” to child support for the sheer principle of “revenge.” Their main concern isn’t so much about the welfare of the baby, but rather making sure they “inflict as much damage as possible to” the other parent financially. It feels as though the same can be said for this case involving Halle and Gabriel. Yes, Halle made more money than him, but the child doesn’t need the money as much as she needs the love of BOTH parents. I wish the courts could ORDER both parents to act amicably towards each other (or if they can’t do that, then at least provide for the child’s expenses through a mediator). Even if parents can no longer get along they should never take out their personal issues on the child. I realize that divorces usually generate anger and resentment between both parties and most times it is difficult to put emotions aside. I have no idea if Mr. Aubry is employed or not, but I do know that their separation got ugly and he was the one who filed legal documents asking a judge to force Ms. Berry to give him $15,000 to $20,000 a month. What I would LOVE to see happen is for a court to “decide” exactly what expenses the child needs, and then appoint an overseer to make sure that the money taken from the other parent goes “directly” towards those expenses. Does anyone really “believe” that this baby uses up $20,000 dollars worth of baby items a month? I don’t… Once the other parent gets the money then they will use a small portion of it for the child and use the remainder for his or her own personal items. If the court wishes that the child (whose name in this case is Nahlia) to keep living in the surroundings to which she has become accustomed then the judge may as well order the couple to stay with each other in the house. That way the baby can hear all the screams and yells from the parents each night that she is accustomed to hearing.  I realize that in most cases child support IS needed (because one parent can’t do it alone and it takes two to make a child). I have no problems with the issuance of child support. However, rather than focus on a straight monetary monthly figure I would rather see money go “specifically” to pay for the items that the child “really” needs. That amount will vary as the child grows but it won’t be set on one “standard” figure. When it comes to the love of a child, there should be NO animosity. If feuding parents can actually put their issues aside, then they shouldn’t even NEED to go to court. Here is the Phantom Poet to take us off into the weekend. Have a great one:

 

When it comes to being parents for our child, you are and I am

But to take my child and make me pay $20,000 a month? Damn!

The court has ways to make people pay and the will of the court is strong

I just wish the court can find a way to force both parents to just “get along”

When divorce happens that usually means that the couple’s emotions have “boiled”

But 20 grand a month won’t guarantee a parent’s love, plus the child gets spoiled

It would be great for two supposedly mature adults to work out an agreement of sort

But too often both parents act like “little children” in court

Some monetary decisions are too much and excessive by far

You can tell because  the next day you might find the the other parent with a “new car”

A child will remember the days when Mommy stayed with Daddy and would always kiss him

But NONE of this comes into play when it comes to the child support system

They are only concerned with who is going to receive money and who has to give it

As far as anything else goes, what’s love got to do with it?

It would be great for parents to act civilly and NOT let their resentments show

But we all know that this isn’t really about the child, so off to child support court we go…

 

“I wish the baby could tell the parents to stop acting like children”… The Phantom Poet

 

Taken from the web site WWW.Love-notes.co (“Dedicated to the emotional needs of women”)

 

Verdine White (bass guitarist for Earth, Wind and Fire) and Brett Jolly

 

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