Brett Jolly’s Daily Thought (Topic: 30 year lie)

Mr. Jolly,





Subject: 30 year lie


My wife and I are in our late 50″s. We’ve been together for 30 years and have children. I just found out that she began dating me only so she could make another man she was seeing jealous. Ever since I found out I cannot look at my wife. I cannot even talk to her. All I want to do is die. I feel like I have been living a 30 year lie. Please tell me what I should do.





For someone who only wanted to make another man jealous, she surely went overboard, don’t you think? The both of you have been married for over 30 years now (with children). She could have shut down this false pretense even sooner so that she wouldn’t have had to marry you, but lo and behold she did it and you both are still together to this very day (Isn’t THAT something?). Yeah, I guess she MUST still be lying to you (By the way, don’t forget to vote for Herman Cain on the November ballot…).  I have always said that it is not how you start, but how you finish that counts. No matter what her original intentions were back then I just can’t imagine her “not” loving you now. Now I would like for you to check out this food for thought. The best way for her to make the other guy jealous was for her to go out and get a man who was even BETTER than he was (Does that make sense to you?).  In other words, that other guy probably wouldn’t have cared (or gotten jealous) if you were some overweight, unattractive, dumb, disfigured slump of a man (By the way, this doesn’t really apply to you… right? Uh… right?). If you were indeed the better man then your wife got exactly what she wanted. There is a good possibility that you might be a little overly “sensitive” when it comes to this matter. A 30-year lie shouldn’t bring you love, marriage and kids. You should know that… If you still feel as though you want to die over this then you’ve got issues… You need to wake up, smell the coffee, and make “mad” passionate love to the woman who “obviously” loves you back (Uh, maybe you can scratch the “mad” part). Here is a Phantom Poet moment to help get you back in the mood:





My wife chose me over all the other fellas


But I found out she was only trying to make them jealous


How dare she go off and marry someone like me


Knowing full well that with someone else is where she really wanted to be


She even had the nerve to live happily ever after and have kids with me, too


But that was only her way of telling the other guy “I’ll show you”


Now I can no longer look at her, because I feel like I’m second best


But even after 30 something years she “still” has great breasts


But I now feel as though our whole 30-year marriage was nothing but a lie


Her old boyfriend had a trans-gender operation, and is no longer a guy…


To be truthful, I have a secret to tell of my own kind


The reason I got with you over the other girl was because you had a bigger behind


The more I think about it, I got the better deal (or at least that’s the way it sounds)


Because now her behind is WAY bigger than yours, but she’s also 400 pounds


So I guess I have to admit that you were my second choice, too


But you know what? This is one “second choice” that is “still” in love with you…





Honey? Your old boyfriend is on the phone. Why does he sound so feminine and want to talk to ME?


Brett Jolly and Chubby Checker (vocalist for “the Twist)







                                                      The Phantom Poet


If you have a topioc that you would like to feature for my Daily Thought, just email me at